As if I Came Out of Egypt
My much loved Aunt, Ruth Klemens, my mother's elder sister, died in October 2011. She had lived in Storrs, Connecticut, close to the university where my Uncle, Paul, had been a distinguished Professor of Physics. In her bedside table were two small diaries and a sheaf of typewritten manuscript and notes. One diary contained contemporaneous sketches, maps and lists of the concentration camp transports, she was, after all the daughter of a historian and political activist. The other contained more personal notes. The following is extracted from the typescript, a copy of which my cousin Michael, provided to me.
Tomorrow is the start of Passover, the Jewish festival that marks the exodus, when we say that each of us is obligated to see ourselves as though we personally came out from Egypt and hence out of slavery. Notes in parentheses are added for clarification, either by my Aunt () or myself []. I have only selected a very few examples of entries to give a sense of the content.
Diary Notes. This is the diary I carried with me through the camp. I had "won" it in a magazine contest, and decided to enter addresses and birthdays etc of family and friends (in ink!) before using it.
I took it with me to the camp and made small entries of special events. I only had a pencil, and later it became almost illegible.
After the war - several years later in fact, I decided to reread it and translate it from the Dutch into English. At some point I came across the notation of seeing Anne and Margot Frank - late December 1944.
Since the diary was intended for 1943, I drew a line across the page when a 1944 entry was warranted.
Part I. Notes during the time I spent in concentration camps. Westerbork. Starting on June 20, 1943 - January 21, 1945
(The song that follows was often sung in the camp. Though it is a love song, it seemed to have special meaning to us all, speaking of a common star, of a return, of a miracle, etc.)
Ich weiß, es wird einmal ein Wunder geschehn
und dann werden tausend Märchen wahr.
Ich weiß, so schnell kann keine Liebe vergehn,
die so groß ist und so wunderbar.
Wir haben beide denselben Stern
und dein Schicksal ist auch meins.
Du bist mir fern und doch nicht fern,
denn unsere Sehlen sind eins.
Und darum wird einmal ein Wunder geschehn
und ich weiß, daß wir uns wiedersehn!
[I know that once a miracle will happen
and then a thousand fairy tales will come true.
I know that no love can be over so quickly,
which is so large and so wonderful
We both share the same star,
and your fate is also mine.
You are so far away from me and still not that far,
because our souls are one.
And that's why once a miracle will happen,
and I know, that we'll see each other again!]
Song by Zarah Leander (Berlin Cabaret)
Movie: "Die Grosse Liebe" 1942, Bruno Balz, Michael Jary. Music/Lyrics.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xp6l59mZojM]
Sunday, June 20, 1943. Picked up from home by the Germans at 10.30 pm. Raid on homes throughout our district. Very warm - long wait. Arrival in Westerbork (Dutch camp) at 8.00 pm next day.
Tuesday, June 29. Transport with 2000 people sent away.
Tuesday, July 13. Transport to Poland with Oom Jan, Tante Nuti and Fritz. (my only 'real' aunt, uncle and cousin) [my grandmother's sister, she would have joined her were it not for her children, the transport is to Auschwitz and to death]
Monday, July 19. Critical situation for us regarding the Tuesday transport - not enough people to make up the total.
Tuesday, July 20. Thank G-d, we are not being sent away. Mother becomes ill.
Saturday, August 14. Another transport arrives from Amsterdam. It contains the NIZ group (The Dutch-Israel Hospital employees etc. Dineke Roozevelt is among them (a former classmate).
Monday, August 16. Met Dineke.
Tuesday, August 24. Another transport - Dineke among them. I become ill for four days.
Monday, August 30. We are on the transport list, but manage to get off.
Monday, November 22. We are called at 7.00 in the evening to see Miss Slottke; must wait there until 11.30 pm, are then told that the transport on the next day will not take place. This is supposed to be a good transport to the Exchange Camp in Zelle. Meanwhile both Eva and Mirjam [my mother and her other sister] in hospital with jaundice.
Tuesday, December 21. All festivities and celebrations prohibited (Chanukkah).
Part II.
Tuesday, January 11 1944. Departure from Westerbork at 6.00 pm. (Arrive in Celle Aufenthaltslager Bergen Belsen nr Hannover).
Monday, January 17. We are kept standing for four hours on the camp square, called Appelterrein. Afterwards we all go through the quarantine procedure and the showers
Tuesday, January 18. I am assigned to work in the potato kitchen.
Tuesday, January 20. I am changed to another work place - the Shoe Commando (place where shoes are being processed for their valuable uppers and laces, buckles etc.).
Friday, April 18. First day Pesach [Passover]. Work as usual. Another air battle rages, two deaths occur. Part of the Bekleidungs Lager (clothing storage area) is set on fire.
Friday, May 6. Mrs. Mainz (barak leader) has to go to the prison cell because she miscounted our numbers earlier in the week. However, she is released after a short while.
Sunday, May 14. Everyone is twice called upon to exercise on the Appel square. More bread is stolen. Thorough search is conducted. Erica (friend) has to stand by the fence for three hours. Day for writing.
Wednesday, May 18. More rumours about an invasion. The Frenchmen sing at work.
Monday, May 30. Feeling a little better. Barak 15 has to move. Men from the shoe detail are punished - they have to use their food bowls to dig into the sand and fill innumerable holes until 11.00 pm.
Wednesday, June 1. A Commission is expected. Everything has to be made neat and tidy. There is a new line of work.
Wednesday, June 8. Himmler (?) [Parentheses in original] arrives. Babies are given less food again.
[Shortly after this the typescript concludes and the remaining transcription is hand written. I will skip most of these further entries, which speak of hunger, beatings and transports, for the moment].
December 20. Margot and Anne Frank in the other camp. [Margot is my Aunt's friend. This is probably the last account of them.]
January 19, 1945. Moers arrives - we are called.
January 20. Medical approval granted - we start packing.
January 21. We leave at 9 am - quarantine, bath - appel - 4.00 departure for Switzerland.
January 22. Train trip via Berlin.
January 23. Ravensbruck - people are dropped off - at last moment we are permitted to stay on train. [My grandmother is too ill to move having given her food to her children.]
January 25. Arrival in St. Gallen / Buhler camp. Mother died at 1.15 am.
January 26. Funeral at 3.30 in the afternoon in Kreuzlingen.
[There is more.]